~when she is sad she brings down the moon~

Yesterday was Marilyn Monroe's birthday. In honor...

I'm taking a break from drawing, I'm just not feeling it the past couple days and the more everything I do totally sucks, the more pissed off I get. It won't be a long break I'm sure, drawing is definetly helping me stay focused on my sobriety and helping me stay clean. No matter how bad a day is, how bad an urge is I can always pop on my headphones, pick up a pencil and draw till the world disappears. But for whatever reason, I'm completely uninspired to do anything. Hopefully that's not a bad thing...call it creative road block? I don't know.

I had THE worst nightmare last night and I feel like a walking zombie today (no pun intended) I was up at 4am, sweating, pacing, heart racing and checking on Taylor. I didn't just poke my head in her room, I had to walk up to her, pull the covers away and make sure she was breathing. I was spooked. But when I leaned down to kiss her forehead, she smacked my head away in her sleep...good to know she was fine :) Anyway I had this nightmare that me, Taylor and some other people were all kidnapped or something, and held hostage in some worn down, dirty ass old mental hospital. These zombie things were pulling people in and killing them in back rooms. I don't remember much but Taylor grabbed a bicycle and rode down the hallway to "talk some sense" into these monster things. I remember walking down the hallway after her and looking into some room and seeing one of the zombie's touching Taylor's hair like he was sizing her up. Then we were pulled back into the room we had been before, without Taylor, and I was flipping out trying to get back to her. Some dead looking nurse came in wearing one of those rubber aprons like they wear for an autopsy and told us "It's time" I can't remember much after that, but being pulled down the hallway to where Taylor WAS standing and telling myself in my dream to wake the fuck up.
I woke up and my heart was racing. It freaked me out so bad I tried to stay awake, I was afraid I'd go right back into it again if I fell asleep. I dunno, maybe I shouldn't have watched Taylor play "Left 4 Dead" or I should stop listening to horror rock...lol. Nah...that will never change. Maybe I should take it as inspiration to draw me some zombie creatures or something macabre like that. *shrug*

xoxo